(Shows Duplicate 7 taking Mecha Calvin and Robo Hobbes back to his lab.)
Duplicate 7: The remains of Mecha Calvin and Robo Hobbes. Just what I need...
(He works on them and is seen putting the finishing touches on them)
Duplicate 7: Perfect! The new and improved robots are ready for combat!
Hugh: (Walks in) Hey boss, I made a Sandwich and Milkshake for you, you want it?
Duplicate 7: (Grabs Milkshake) I'll take the Milkshake, but I'd rather have a BLT Hugh.
Hugh: Okay, I'll go make one. (Leaves)
Duplicate 7: Jack!
Jack: Yeah boss?
Duplicate 7: Start up Mecha-Calvin 2.0 and Ultra-Robo-Hobbes 2.0 for me.
Jack: I'm on it boss. (Presses button that brings the two robots to life)
Duplicate 7: Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
Robot Henchman: Excuse me Master Duplicate 7, but we managed to bust Dr. Scientist out of prison.
Duplicate 7: Brilliant! The world will soon be mine! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!
(Cuts to black and the opening credits roll, which is a direct parody of the Neon Genesis Evangilion opening)
20th Century Fox Presents...
A Bad Robot Production...
A Steven Spielberg film...
Calvin and Hobbes 2: World Tour
Michael J. Fox...
with Elijah Wood...
and Ralph Macchio...
Casting by Nick Davis
Music by John Williams
Costumes Designed by Banana Republic
Edited by Ian Reynolds
Production Designed by Jeff Mann
Photography Directed by John Toll
Executive Produced by Justin Theroux
Screenplay by Steven Spielberg and Jon Vitti
Produced by Bill Watterson, Justin Theroux and Ben Stiller
Directed by Steven Spielberg
(After opening credits, cuts to Calvin and Hobbes walking through town)
Calvin: Ahh! This is the life! Spending time doing absolutely nothing when we have nothing to do!
Hobbes: That sentence made no sense at all.
Calvin: Shut up furball. (Sees convenience store) Hey! Lets stop in there and get some snacks!
Hobbes: I'm for it!
(Cuts to Calvin and Hobbes walking through the park with various snacks)
Calvin: Saving the world sure does pay.
Hobbes: You bet it does.
(Calvin sees Little League game beginning to start)
Calvin: Hey Hobbes, I got a good idea.
Hobbes: What would that be.
Calvin: Just go pounce those umps over there and bring their clothes back.
Hobbes: Uh, okay.
(Hobbes leaves, with screams heard in the background, and Hobbes comes back with two umpire uniforms)
Hobbes: So are we going to work this game?
Calvin: Yeah, lets have some fun and show them whose boss.
(Cuts to Calvin and Hobbes on the field)
Calvin: Play Ball!
(Pitcher throws a ball that goes over Calvin's head)
Calvin: Strike 1!
Coach: WHAT?! HOW ON EARTH IS THAT A STRIKE?! YOUR BLIND!
Calvin: HEY! DON'T QUESTION MY AUTHORITY! YOUR EJECTED!
Coach: WHAT?! ARE YOU INSANE?!
Calvin: YOUR THE INSANE ONE! NOW GET OUT BEFORE I HAVE MY TIGER POUNCE YOU!
Coach: Fine, fine.... (Walks away)
(Pitcher throws a ball that goes to Calvin's feet)
Calvin: Strike 2!
Calvin: YOUR EJECTED!
Batter: FOR WHAT?!
Calvin: FOR DISRESPECTING ME!
Parent: GET THIS UMP!
Calvin: Oh crud.
(Cuts to Calvin and Hobbes running away from an angry mob, before turning onto their street and loosing them)
Hobbes: That was too close for comfort.
Calvin: This is why I don't play organized sports, there's always someone yelling at you. Lets go home and watch some TV.
(Cuts to Calvin and Hobbes watching TV)
Calvin: Ahh! This is the life! Nothing to do at all!
Dad: I'll get it. (Opens door) Can I help you.
Man in a Suit: I'm looking for a Calvin and Hobbes. I need them to come with me on official top secret buisness.
Dad: Uh, okay. I'll go get them.
Calvin: Who's that?
Dad: Some guy in a suit wants you and your tiger to come with him.
Calvin: Great, just when I thought I could watch TV until I pass out.
(Calvin and Hobbes walk outside)
Man: Are you Calvin and Hobbes?
Man: Hop in my car.
(Cuts to the Man's Car pulling into the OTSTTS)
Calvin: OTSTTS? What kind of name is that?
Man: It stands for Organization That Stops Threats to Society Sir.
Hobbes: Huh, boy, that's some name.
Calvin: G.R.O.S.S. is a better name than this.
(Cuts to Calvin and Hobbes being led to a long hallway with a big door)
Man: (Opens the door) The Director will now see you two, have fun.
(Calvin and Hobbes walk in, and the door shuts behind them)
Hobbes: Do you think he was being sarcastic?
Calvin: Who knows.
(Calvin and Hobbes walk toward desk, and the Director Turns around and reveals himself)
Director: Well hello there. I am the Director of the OTSTTS. You must be Calvin and Hobbes, the two that stopped that mad scientist and his duplicates.
Calvin: That would be us. Those chumps couldn't handle us. Now they are rotting in prison for the rest of their miserable lives.
Director: Erm, about that. Our agents have discovered that Duplicate Number 7 has broken Dr. Scientist out of prison, and now they have began building a robotic empire and have been sending them all over the world to take over the world.
Calvin and Hobbes in unison: WHAT?!
Hobbes: You never told me there was another duplicate!
Calvin: I DIDN'T KNOW! HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?!
Hobbes: YOUR THE CREATOR! YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN!
Calvin: IT HAD TO OF BEEN AN INCOMPLETE DUPLICATE!
Director: Stop arguing!
(Calvin and Hobbes silence.)
Director: If they escaped, we need you to stop them. They are currently hiding here.
(The Director points at a giant screen, where an image of Hollywood pops up.)
Calvin: Hey, cool! Hollywood!
Director: We have word that a henchman of the incomplete duplicate is hiding on the Sony Pictures Lot.
Hobbes: We'll do it.
Director: Excellent. But before you go, we've given you some things that will help you on your journey...
(The Director presses a button on his desk and a wagon, a box, and various gadgets appear)
Calvin: Woah! Cool!
Hobbes: Uh, this stuff looks awfully familiar...
Director: Well, these are OTSTTS standard gadgets and objects. So the wagon and box we've provided have several technological advancements.
Calvin: Cool! I can't wait to use them all and launch my plan for global domination with these babies! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
(The Director and Hobbes roll their eyes)
Calvin: Cmon Hobbes! Times a-wasting! We got henchmen to get rid of! Places to save! Movie and TV deals to make!
Hobbes: Alright, alright. I'm coming...
(Hobbes hops in)
Director: Good luck you two don't-
(Calvin presses a button on a wagon and they fly up and crash through the roof and zoom off)
Director: -let us down... (Sighs) There goes my chances of my insurance getting lowered...
(Cuts to Calvin and Hobbes flying on the wagon, Hobbes is reading a map)
Hobbes: So after we get rid of this henchman of this duplicate of yours, what do you wanna do to kill some time and let loose?
Calvin: Well, considering this dude is at Sony Picture Studios, maybe we go see some tapings of Jeopardy! or Wheel of Fortune?
Hobbes: I was more thinking The Price is Right.
Calvin: But that's not even in Sony Pictures Hobbes! We could get free tickets once we get rid of that nutcase!
(Calvin and Hobbes crash into the Hollywood sign, they fall down and crash onto a sidwalk, while the Hollywood sign falls down)
Hobbes: Good going...
Calvin: Well its not MY fault you didn't tell me that I wasn't going to crash into the Hollywood sign!
Hobbes: Actually it is...
Calvin: Shut up, furball.
(The Sony Pictures Lot roams dead ahead.)
Hobbes: There it is. The Sony lot.
Calvin: According to my calculations, the henchman is in the Sony Pictures Animation Lot.
Hobbes: Great. The animation studio that produces the worst animated films.
Calvin: You liked Hotel Transylvania.
Hobbes: Indeed I did.
Calvin: Let's get him.
(Hugh is sneaking around the Sony Pictures Animation Lot.)
Hugh: OK. Duplicate 7 said to wreak havoc, so I might as well interrupt a voice recording session for Hotel Transylvania 3!
(Hugh opens a door to a voice recording for Hotel Transylvania 3, where Adam Sandler is recording his lines.)
Sandler: A Cruise Ship Trip? That would sound...
Hugh: Really BAD!
Genndy Tartakovsky: CUT! What the heck? Who are you?
Hugh: I am Hugh of Duplicate 7's army!
Sandler: Genndy, would you get him out?
Tartakovsky: My pleasure.
(Tartakovsky inches towards Hugh, in a fighting stance.)
Hugh: Come get some!
(Hugh pulls out a ray gun and shoots Tartakovsky into a wall. Then the wagon bursts throughthe ceiling and almost crushes Sandler.)
Sandler: Whoa! What was that?
Calvin: The set for a giant battle.
Sandler: What's that supposed to mean?
Calvin: It means that I've come to beat up this moron of some duplicate I didn't know exsisted.
Hugh: Gah! I spiky haired kid with a tiger! Oh wait! You kinda look like my boss!
Calvin: Geez, how dumb are you? I'M HIS CREATOR!
Hugh: Wait? Dupe 7 isn't human?
Calvin: NO! HE'S-Well, I guess he is, even though he's technically a duplicate.
Hugh: He's a duplicate?! Of who?
Hobbes: I don't think this "evil" duplicate of yours has any good henchmen.
Calvin: Ya think?
Hugh:: Meh, I'll just destroy you anyway. Eat this! (Throws microphone at Calvin)
Calvin: Ow! Why you little-
Sandler: I'm gonna go call the police now...
Hugh: Oh cool, I guess I had a laser gun on me and didn't notice. (Shoots it at Calvin, who uses a shield to protect himself)
Calvin: Nice try werido! Nobody defeats Calvin the Bold! (Shots laser gun, but Hugh misses)
Hugh: Ha! Missed me! (Gets pounced by Hobbes)